being offended | Devotions by Chris Hendrix

Tag Archives: being offended

November 2, 2022 · 5:52 AM

Making Allowances

After spending a weekend in New York City, it felt like everyone was on edge and angry at each other. A light would turn green, and if the car in front didn’t move within a second, the other drivers would honk and yell. On one occasion, we were riding bikes and stopped at the light so we could turn. We were at the back of the crowd waiting when another bike rider flew past us yelling obscenities at us. My first thought was to roll my bike back into his to shut his foul mouth up. I’m human! I don’t know why he was angry or upset. Maybe he was late. Maybe something happened in his life. I don’t know. After the initial anger at him flared up, I got control of my feelings and crossed the street with neither of us physically or mentally hurt.

In 2 Samuel 16, King David’s son Absalom was coming to Jerusalem to take over the throne. Instead of fighting his son, David and a small army left town. As he crossed over the Mount of Olives, a descendant of King Saul followed along side them. He began to yell at King David and throwing stones at him. After a few minutes of name calling, one of David’s bodyguards requested permission to decapitate the man. David, had control of his feelings wouldn’t let him. He reminded him that the man had cause for being upset with him and said, “Perhaps the Lord will see that I am being wronged and will bless me because of these curses today” (NLT). Instead of lashing out, he chose to not let it bother him.

Colossians 3:13 says, “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.” We need to give grace to people as we have received it. Offenses occur when we allow our feelings to get hurt or become angry at something an imperfect person has done. If you’re going to be around people, you’re going to get multiple opportunities to be offended by someone else’s faults. When we make allowances for people to be imperfect, we open ourselves up to show them undeserved grace. God is able to use that act to win them over. Remember that it’s His kindness that leads us to repentance (Romans 2:4). God can use our kindness and grace as well. Instead of allowing ourselves to get riled up over our feelings, we should look for ways to offer grace. Remember we are to do unto others first as we would like them to do unto us.

Photo by Alex Green:

Forgiving Offenses

We live in the age of offense where everyone seems to be easily offended by everything. As imperfect people, we are going to offend people and people are going to offend us. In the workplace, in friendships and at church, when you interact with others, you’re given the chance to not see eye to eye with someone. We all have different points of view. We all have different thicknesses of skin. We all have the choice to make room for someone to be human or to hold them to a state of perfection. In this current age, we’re holding imperfect people to a perfect standard when we don’t see eye to eye, and then we crush them when their imperfections show.

In Colossians 3:12, Paul is speaking to the people of God and tells them to clothe themselves in kindness, compassion, humility, gentleness and patience. I like the imagery of clothing yourself with these things. He’s saying, wrap up your imperfections and thin skin with these attributes. These are things that don’t come natural to all of us, but as believers we can adopt these attributes into our lives and learn to incorporate them into who we are. After he gives all of those attributes in one sentence, he makes a special note to add one more to the list. He says, “Be tolerant with one another and forgive one another whenever any of you has a complaint against someone else. You must forgive one another just as the Lord has forgiven you” (GNT).

Forgiveness is the act of releasing someone from something they’ve done to you that has offended or hurt you. As Christians, we must learn how not to have a chip on our shoulder looking for offenses and to learn how to make room for the faults in others. When we get offended, we need to release it. Unforgiveness truly hurts ourselves more than the other person. It can create a root of bitterness within us and affect every area of our life. It causes us to look for payback and to try to hurt the other person in some way. Forgiveness releases us of that burden and keeps our hearts pure before God. When we quit looking to be offended and when we release those who have offended us, we become more Christ-like.

Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

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