Tag Archives: defining characteristics

Defining Qualities

In the last month, I’ve been to two funerals for men I’ve known, both of whom lived to 88. At each funeral, family got up to speak and share stories. Some stories made you laugh and others were very sentimental. In each case, people shared about what mattered to these men. They told of their defining characteristics and values that they lived by. They then shared how these defining characteristics shaped their own lives. I began to think how each of these men influenced my life. I also began to think of my core values and my defining characteristics. What would people say mine are? Are mine influencing others to live out godly characteristics? We all have defining characteristics that we live by and are known by. Are we intentional about those?

I love the story of Ruth in the Bible. We learn very quickly that her husband, brother in law and father in law all died leaving three women behind. Her mother in law, Naomi, decided to leave the country they had moved to and return home. Since her daughters in law were from the foreign country, she asked them to stay. This is where we begin to see what Ruth was made of. Her loyalty to her mother in law kept her by Naomi’s side. Her kindness showed through when she began to glean the fields for food for them. She showed how courageous she was by leaving her culture behind and adopting a new one. Her defining characteristics attracted a man of character himself. Boaz was an influential person because of his character and honesty. They could have bypassed their values several times, but their character wouldn’t let them do it. Because of that, not only are they mentioned in the Bible, they are in the family tree of Jesus.

Their great, great grandson Solomon wrote in Proverbs 3:3, “Do not let mercy and kindness and truth leave you [instead let these qualities define you]; Bind them [securely] around your neck, Write them on the tablet of your heart” (AMP). The defining qualities they lived by were passed down generationally. As you think about your own defining qualities and characteristics, are mercy, kindness and truth part of them? If not, it’s not too late to make them part of your life. Old qualities and characteristics are hard to break, but not impossible. That’s why Solomon tells us to tie them around our neck and write them on our heart. We can change what defines us and how we live through the power of the Holy Spirit. We no longer have to be defined by our past. God has given you new life and new characteristics to live by. Ask Him to help you live in such a way that these define you instead of your old life.

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Defining Qualities

Did you know that in every group of people you are a part of regularly, you are known for something? You have a personal brand that people identify you by. It can be a good brand or not in their eyes. You may be known as the funny person in the group, the wise one with all the answers, the one who keeps the group together, etc. Have you ever stopped to think how others define you? What qualities stand out to them? For many of us, this is a blind spot in our lives that we rarely get a glimpse into unless we ask or someone let’s us know. We usually think we are known for one thing, but others know us by something else.

Have you ever considered what you want to be known for? Have you thought about what you would want your epitaph to say? I know that sounds a bit morbid, but if you start with the end in mind, you can make changes now that will get you there. You can do things that improve certain qualities in your life so they become who you are. You can also do things to minimize other qualities that detract from who you’re trying to be. It all starts with recognizing what you’re known for now and what you want to be known for.

Proverbs 3:3 says, “Do not let mercy and kindness and truth leave you [instead let these qualities define you]” (AMP). The Bible recommends these three as things we should be known for. Do others consider you as a merciful person? Do they think you’re kind? What about truthful? If you want to improve your influence in other people’s lives, begin to cultivate these three qualities. Nurture them, give them room to grow and they will begin to define you. Every one of us are known for something by others. The more godly the qualities we’re known for, the easier it is to point others to Him.

Photo by Jeremy Bishop on Unsplash

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