Tag Archives: hitting rock bottom

Leaving The Pit Of Despair

September 25th holds a special place in my heart and on my calendar. It’s the day where I hit rock bottom in my life. After seven months of having the bottom fall out from underneath me, this was the day I gave up. I walked into my house, laid down on the living room floor, curled up in the fetal position and bawled like a baby. I was hurting inside so badly and was tired of losing everything. In that moment I cried out to God and told Him I was done. It was then that I heard a still, small voice say, “Finally.” I had been doing thing on my own and living how I wanted to live. God spoke and said if I was ready to build my life His way and live how He wanted me to, He would rebuild my life. I repented right there and agreed to change. I walked over to my calendar and wrote, “The Bottom.”

In Luke 15:11-32, Jesus told a parable about another man who tried to do things his way. He went to his father and demanded his inheritance while his father was still living. He insulted his father and his whole village. He took the money, went to a foreign land and lived how he wanted instead of how he was raised. He was having a good time until he ran out of money. If that wasn’t bad enough, there was famine that caused food to be scare. Then the economy crashed and he couldn’t find work except the lowliest of positions. After struggling, he finally hit rock bottom and decided to seek forgiveness. He headed home. Verse 20 says, “So he returned home to his father. And while he was still a long way off, his father saw him coming. Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him” (NLT). His father put a new robe on him, put the family ring on his finger, killed the best calf and had a celebration. His son had returned and agreed to live by the father’s rules.

Psalm 40:2 says, “He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along.” I’ve been to the pit of despair and cried out like the Prodigal Son. A friend recently asked for practical steps to get out of that pit. I to,d him it starts with repentance and crying out to God. It takes determining to make changes in your life and leaving situations, people and places that got you there. It takes committing to reading the Bible, praying daily and getting involved in a body of believers who will love you. When I made these changes, God lifted me out of the pit, put my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I made progress. It took more than ten years to get back to the point where I felt like I was back to level ground. It’s not easy climbing out of that pit of despair, but it’s possibly by surrendering to God.

Photo by Tyler Mullins on Unsplash

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Redeemed From The Pit

Yesterday was the 19th anniversary of the lowest point in my life. I had been through six months of having the bottom fall out from under me. I went through the death of a friend, a divorce, a repossession, loss of friendships and a lot more. One thing after another seemed to crumble. Everything I held dear was being taken from my life as a result of decisions I had made. Then, on September 25, 2003, my business failed and I was out of a job. It felt like my life was over as I laid down on my living room floor that night. I cried out to God in surrender as the life I built was destroyed by this storm. However, I still had my foundation in Him. I told God I was ready to end my life because I couldn’t do it anymore.

I felt the voice of God remind me that i had built my life with my desires instead of His. I vowed that if He helped me out of that hole, I would build my life His way. I marked my calendar with the words, “The Bottom”. Getting back to where I felt I was at ground level took over a decade. Now it’s almost a decade past that and I can look back and see how far God brought me. It wasn’t easy and the progress has felt slow and minimal. Yet, when I look back, I can see where I’ve been, and now look forward to where He is taking me. It’s not an easy thing to look back, but it’s necessary for all of us. When it feels like we’re on a treadmill going nowhere fast, God is actually working in our life and helping us along the way.

Psalm 103:2-5 says, “Bless and affectionately praise the Lord, O my soul, And do not forget any of His benefits; Who forgives all your sins, Who heals all your diseases; Who redeems your life from the pit, Who crowns you [lavishly] with lovingkindness and tender mercy; Who satisfies your years with good things, So that your youth is renewed like the [soaring] eagle” (AMP). God is in the process of redeeming your life from the pit. No matter how deep a hole you feel like you’re in, He can get you out. Remember all the things He has done, knowing He will continue to work out all things for your good. He will satisfy your life with good things once again. Trust in Him no matter how dark it seems. Your pit may be deep, but His grace is deeper still.

Photo by James McGill on Unsplash

7 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

Focus On The Good


It was 14 years ago today that I hit rock bottom in life. I had endured five months of everything going wrong in my life, and on September 25th, I lost my job to top it off. Every time I thought things couldn’t get worse, they did. It was almost a daily occurrence. I laid down on the floor of my living room and told God, “If one more thing happens, I give up. I refuse to go down any further.” I went to my calendar and wrote, “The Bottom,” on today’s date. I vowed to climb out if that hole until I saw daylight again.

I didn’t know it would take about a decade before I got out of the hole that those five months created. I suffered some set backs through those years, but I never went further down than I had been that night. I was on the edge of ending my life because I couldn’t take the failure and the pain anymore. I was embarrassed of where my life was, and I knew I was going to have to make some changes to how I was living if I was going to get out of the hole. For starters, I was going to give control of the rebuild to God.

Clearly my way didn’t work. My life had been life a block tower that a kid built. It got to a point that it could no longer sustain itself, and it all came crashing down. I knew if I gave God control it would be built the right way and would be more stable. Fourteen years later, I can tell you that was the best decision I made. God has been good to me and has restored the years that were stolen. He has taken me farther than I dreamed I could go, and has given me more joy than I could have imagined. 

Today, instead of focusing on the bottom, I like to focus on the good things He’s done for me. It’s no longer about where I was. It’s not about where I’m going, and it’s all because of who God is. Psalm 103:3 says, “Let all that I am praise the Lord; may I never forget the good things he does for me” (NLT). We need to all make the decision to quit reflecting on past failures and pains, and instead focus on the good things God does for us. I can tell you it made a difference in my life, and I’m sure it will make a difference in yours. 

5 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized