Tag Archives: watch what you say

Controlling Your Words

When a toddler is mad at someone and wants to hurt them, they use their mouth to bite them. When they get a little older and they want to hurt someone, they say, “You’re not my best friend!” As they age a little more, they start name calling. Then the preteen and teen years come and the put downs start. It’s not long before they’re married, and when they get into an argument with their spouse, they use their words to attack the vulnerabilities of the person they love most in the world. No one has to teach us to use words to hurt. It starts at a very young age and if we don’t learn to control that urge, we’ll leave a lot of hurting people in our wake.

In Genesis 37, Joseph shared his God given dream with his brothers. Verse 8 says, “His brothers responded, ‘So you think you will be our king, do you? Do you actually think you will reign over us?’ And they hated him all the more because of his dreams and the way he talked about them” (NLT). Their put downs of Joseph turned into murmuring among themselves about Joseph. Those words became a breeding ground for bitterness and hate until finally they decided to kill him. Instead they sold him into slavery for 14 years until God raised him up to be second in command of Egypt which saved his family. When they realized it was him, they were scared. But in Genesis 50:20, he spoke kindness to them, “You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people.” His words restored the relationship.

Ephesians 4:29 says, “Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.” You and I have a choice every day of how to use our words. We can use them to tear people down or to build them up. In this passage, Paul leads up to this verse telling us as believers to not lie or to sin when we get angry. Instead of using our words in anger towards someone, we must learn to edify. The power of life and death is in the words you use. Don’t go shooting it off just because you’re mad, angry or upset. Think about how your words will be interpreted and the ramifications of what you say because once words get past your lips, you can never get them back. Make it a habit to praise the people around you and watch lives change including yours.

Photo by Sujal Patel on Unsplash

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Controlling The Tongue

  
Have you ever said the wrong thing at the wrong time? It happens to me all the time. I ignore the filter and say things that hurt, offend, or are not uplifting. It’s not intentional. It just comes out. I think many of us are guilty of poorly chosen words or of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. The book of James says that no man came tame the tongue, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try to watch what we say.

The Bible has a lot to say about the tongue and our words. I believe that while we will never tame it, we can learn to control it and use it better. We have a choice in the words we use each and every day. Some are spoken in the heat of the moment and others are well thought out. No matter when, what, or how we say something, once those words leave our mouth, they can never be taken back. It’s important that we choose wisely.

Here are some Bible verses to help watch what we say.

1. Watch your tongue and keep your mouth shut, and you will stay out of trouble.
Proverbs 21:23 NLT

2. Thoughtless words can wound as deeply as any sword, but wisely spoken words can heal.
Proverbs 12:18 GNT

3. A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire.
Proverbs 15:1 MSG

4. Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.
Proverbs 18:21 ESV

5. If you claim to be religious but don’t control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and your religion is worthless.
James 1:26 NLT

6. And my tongue shall talk of Your righteousness, rightness, and justice, and of [my reasons for] Your praise all the day long.
Psalm 35:28 AMP

7. For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven…

A time to tear and a time to mend. A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
Ecclesiastes 3:1, 7 NLT

8. Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding.
Proverbs 17:27 ESV

9. Smart people know how to hold their tongue; their grandeur is to forgive and forget.
Proverbs 19:11 MSG

10. Take control of what I say, O LORD, and guard my lips.
Psalms 141:3 NLT

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