Tag Archives: hurt

May 13, 2013 · 8:12 AM

Death of a Dream

Yesterday at church, we did something that we haven’t done since I was a kid. We had people share their testimonies. It wasn’t like it was back then either. I remember as a child sitting on the pew as people would get up and share what The Lord had done in their lives. This wasn’t quite like that. This was a pre planned time of testimonies built into the sermon that went along with it. I thought it was very good.

The sermon was about people in the Bible who’s dreams were crushed, changed or died. We can relate because we’ve all had dreams in our lives that have met similar fates. It’s hard not to get discouraged when that happens. We often think we’re the only one who has dealt with the death of a dream. We feel alone and isolated. Defeated.

That’s where I think testimonies are the biggest help. It shows people in the church that there are others like them who have gone through something similar. It builds a point of connection. It shows that the church isn’t full of people who have it all together. It shows we’re human. It also helps us to overcome. Yes, overcome. Scripture says that we overcome by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony. It’s when others hear what God has done for us that they can become encouraged to keep fighting.

Yesterday, I heard stories of parents who raised their kids in church and how they have quit going. In tears, these parents poured their hearts out to the congregation telling them the struggles they faced during those times. Some had returned while others had not. After reaching the point in believing the dream was dead, God revived the dream and there is hope again.

Another shared of the struggles of expecting to be married by a certain age. They shared about their feelings of worthlessness and that no one wanted them. They shared that they had to let their dream of what they wanted for their life to die, so that God could show them His dream. When we release our dreams and embrace His dreams, we don’t have those feelings of worthlessness and failure anymore. We learn to depend on Him for our sense of worth and not what someone else says or does.

I got to share my own dreams that died. Dreams of a picture perfect life where I had it all. I was poised for a comfortable life and had laid the foundation for a bright future for myself and my family when suddenly it was all taken from me. I shared how there was no hope, no joy and no future. But God, in His mercy, came and met me in that dark place and replanted a dream in me of who He wanted me to become. He gave me hope and restored my joy. I came back from the brink of suicide and murder to a place where He can use me.

Where are you? What dreams have died in your life that you are holding against God? It’s time to let go of them so you can embrace His dream for your life. We can become bitter when we look at Jesus like Mary, the sister of Lazarus, and say, “Lord, if only you had been here, my brother (my dream) would not have died.” It’s when we release those broken, crushed and dead dreams that God can plant a new one in you. It will be greater than the dream you had before. When you look back, you will be thankful he let that dream die because the new one is so much better. I can say that with confidence because I’m there right now.

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May 1, 2013 · 7:06 AM

Shoveling Through a Mountain

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I haven’t been able to get this image out of my head. What you see is the same picture, but one is a close up. That is a man shoveling through that mountain one spade full at a time. We encountered him on the road from Port au Prince to Gonaives on our second day. Ever since then I have thought about him and the work he is doing. At first I felt sorry for him. Tackling a mountain with a shovel is a huge task. He may never get through it, but that isn’t stopping him from shoveling.

Each of us face mountains in our lives. Few of us have the faith it takes to say to that mountain, “Move and be thrown into the sea.” So we sit in the valley and wait. We lack the strength or courage to go over it. So we don’t accomplish what God has for us to do. We make our home in the darkness of the valley. We forget what life in the light is. We forget what joy is. We loosen our grip on our faith and wonder where God is.

Not this man. He looked at that mountain and said, “I may not have the strength or ability to go over you, so I will go through you!” He picked up a shovel and started digging. I imagine it has taken years to get this far. For him, the first few shovels, the first week, first month and year may not have seemed like he was making progress. I’m sure all he could see was that mountain and not what he’d moved.

Recovery doesn’t come quickly. Healing is a process that can take years. There will always be scars from our past. We can choose to embrace them or we can keep them hidden. Jesus didn’t choose to hide His scars, so why do we? In fact, He encourage others like Thomas, “Put your finger here, and look at my hands. Put your hand into the wound on my side. Don’t be faithless any longer. Believe!” Others find hope in your scars. They find faith in your wounds.

If God has brought you through a mountain of pain, share your story to help others believe they can make it. If you’re shoveling through your mountain right now, don’t give up. You are making progress that you may not be able to see from your perspective right now. If you are camped in the darkness, looking at your mountain thinking, “I’ll never get through this,” there is hope. God’s Word is your light in that dark place. Speak scriptures out loud. Look in Psalms and read there. David went through some dark times too.

Your life is precious to God and others. Don’t let that mountain block your vision of what God has for you. He is greater than that mountain and if He is with you, what can stand against you? Certainly not that mountain! Let hope arise in your soul today. You are a child of God made for victory. You’re going to have to pick up that shovel though and start digging. It takes time and effort. You can do this. You can shovel through this mountain.

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April 12, 2013 · 8:42 AM

Go Ahead & Be Angry

I had a conversation last night with a friend who is going through a difficult situation. They tried to give me all the religious answers they thought I wanted to hear. I finally stopped them. I said, “I don’t want to hear what you think I want to hear. I know what you’re going through. It’s ok to be angry right now.” Silence. “You’re right. I am angry right now,” the voice on the other end finally said.

I directed them to the scripture in Ephesians 4:26 that says, “Go ahead and be angry. You to well to be angry – but don’t use your anger as fuel for revenge.” It’s not a sin to be angry and upset. It’s ok especially when you have a right to be upset. God just doesn’t want us to use that anger against the person who wronged us. I shared with them how angry I was and the things I had wanted to do.

Thank God I never acted on the thoughts that entered my mind while I was hurt and angry. If I had acted on them, I would have missed out on the blessings I now enjoy. When you’re going through a difficult time where you’ve lost everything, you think you have nothing to lose because you don’t have anything. That’s a dangerous place to be.

It’s important to pay attention to the thoughts that enter your mind when you’re upset. It’s easy to entertain them. It’s easy to slip off into a fantasy world where you are deceived into believing you can get away with anything. The enemy sends thoughts into your head in a Trojan Horse. They start off harmless and end up with you really contemplating going through with them.

Scripture is clear when it comes to thoughts like that. II Corinthians 10:4-5 says, “We use God’s mighty weapons , not worldly weapons, to knock down the strongholds of human reasoning… We capture rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ.” When we entertain those thoughts that would take us from being angry to sinning, we allow them to take root in our minds and to build strongholds. We are to take those thoughts instead and teach them to obey Christ.

I know that’s easier said than done. It’s easy to entertain the thoughts that let you do what your flesh wants to do. It takes God’s weapons to break them down and teach them to obey Christ. It takes discipline. Usually you are missing those things when you’re hurt and angry. I want to encourage you today if you are hurt, angry or discouraged to know it’s ok to feel that way.

Emotions are given to us by God. He knows we need to vent at times. He knows we want to curl up in bed, pull the covers over our heads and pretend that today doesn’t exist. That’s why he said, “Go ahead and be angry.” He just doesn’t want you to do something stupid with that anger that would stint the future He has for you. Don’t limit what He can do through you because you are hurt and feel you have nothing to lose. This too will pass. You will survive. I’m proof of it. It just takes time. God still has a future for you even when you can’t see it.

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April 10, 2013 · 8:33 AM

Hope to Help You Endure

This morning God woke me up with a single word: hope. There are a lot of people reading this today who need it. I know what it feels like to not have it. I also know that a little bit goes a long way. It keeps you going when you are at the end of your rope. It’s the difference between letting go and hanging on just a little bit longer. To me it has always been one of those things that gives me just enough energy when I think I’m done.

In Psalm 142, David was hiding out in a cave as he was being hunted down. He was feeling like many of us do. Here’s what he says in verses 3-7. See if you can relate:

As I sink in despair, my spirit ebbing away, you know how I’m feeling, know the danger I’m in, the traps hidden in my path.
Look right, look left – there’s not a soul who cares what happens!
I’m up against it, with no exit- bereft, left alone.
I cry out, God, call out: “You’re my last chance, my only hope for life!”
Oh listen, please listen; I’ve never been this low.
Rescue me from those who are hunting me down;
I’m no match for them.
Get me out of this dungeon so I can thank you in public.
Your people will form a circle around me and you’ll bring me showers of blessing!

The lies that were in his head told him that no one cared about him, that no one was there for him and that he was all alone. Maybe you’re hearing the same thing in your mind today. You think you have to face this alone. You feel like there is no one who understands what you’re going through. That isn’t true. Don’t dwell on those thoughts. Those lead to a place where there is no hope.

We serve a God of hope though. In Jeremiah 29:11 God says, “For I know the plans I have for you. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” He has a future for you even when you can’t see it. He also wants to give you hope today even when you can’t see it. He has a plan for you and this thing you’re going through is part of it. He is strengthening you through it and preparing you to endure whatever else may come in the future.

Max Lucado wrote in his book “On the Anvil”, “God may have you go through a storm at 30 so you can endure a hurricane at 60.” I remember going through that storm and thinking, “If this is the storm, I don’t want to be in the hurricane.” What seems impossible to survive now will make it possible for you to endure in the future. You can survive this. You can make it through. There is hope.

I love how David ended his prayer above. “Your people will form a circle around me and you’ll bring me showers of blessing!” Don’t push away the people that God is placing in your life and are trying to form a circle of protection around you. Let them. Let them pray for you and with you. Be open and honest about how you are feeling so they’ll know how to pray. And when you’re on the other side of this, what was a storm will be showers of blessing.

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April 3, 2013 · 7:57 AM

The Purpose in Pain

I had the privilege several years ago of watching a skilled potter work. He took a dark lump of clay and threw it on his spinning wheel. He had to make sure it was centered so it didn’t fly off at high revolutions. As it spun, he dipped his hands in water and began to apply pressure to the spinning lump. It immediately began to change. It grew taller and thinner as he worked with it. Every few minutes, he would stop, pull out a knife and dig into it. He could feel rocks in the clay and needed to cut them out or the vessel would crack later in the fire.

He then took a utensil and placed it in the center of the clay as it was spinning. He began to hollow it out. As he did, he would throw the extra clay in another pot. Once it was hollow, he began to really change the shape. You could now imagine a jar or a flower vase. My mind saw it all painted with gold accents. He then took a pointed utensil and began holding it to the side of the creation. He started making designs on it as it spin. It was really a work of art.

It reminded me of Isaiah 64:8. It says, “We are the clay and you are the potter. We are formed by your hand.” As I think back on my life and the things I’ve endured, I remember that potter with his knife and his utensils. I see times where there were rocks in my life that needed to be cut out. Having a knife stuck in you hurts. Especially when it’s the potters knife. The one you trust. At the time I couldn’t see that He was making sure I wouldn’t crack later.

I think of the times in my life when I was hollowed out. My life felt empty inside. I watched as my life was picked apart and thinned out. My wife left. My friends left. My business left. I had nothing. Now I realize that it’s only when I have been hollowed out that I can truly become a vessel that He can fill up. I was full of myself and things that didn’t matter. He had to empty me so He could fill me. At the time I couldn’t see that He was preparing me to be used by Him for His purpose.

At the end of the demonstration, he held up one of the most beautiful pieces of pottery I had ever seen. I started calculating how much money I had so I could buy this piece. I wanted it so badly. I had picked out the perfect place in my house. I was ready to get into a bidding war until he did something I’ll never forget. He crushed it. My heart sank. He had spent almost an hour meticulously creating such a beautiful vessel. Wasted time, effort and hope. He then said, “Everything I’ve done to this vessel means nothing until it goes through fire. Only then will it really be worth something. Until then, it is easily crushed.”

God allows us to walk through fire in our lives. He allows difficult things to happen because if we don’t, we will easily be crushed when it is time for Him to use us. He made us a promise though in Isaiah 43:1-2. God says to you, “I have called you by name; you are mine… I will be with you… When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up.” There is a purpose to the fires in your life. There is meaning in being hollowed out. There is hope when you’re in the fire. God is at work in you and thinks you are a vessel He can use. Don’t jump off the wheel, dodge the utensils He uses or be afraid of the fire. They’re for your benefit.

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April 2, 2013 · 7:55 AM

Lord Help!

I love Psalm 107. It talks about people in all kinds of situations and were all at the end of their ropes. He talks of those who were wandering aimlessly, those who were hungry, those who were having difficult times that caused them to live in darkness and gloom, those who have turned from God and rebelled, and those who were enduring a storm longer than they thought it would last. In each case, the people cried out, “Lord help!” And He came to the rescue.

In their cases and in most of our cases, we wait until it is an act of desperation to call out to God. It must be the way he hard wired us. We try to do everything on our own and in our own strength. I’m the first to admit that I’m the same way. I don’t think it’s so I get the glory and not Him. It’s more of an “I can do this” attitude. I don’t need anyone’s help. I got myself in this mess and I’ll get myself out.

Meanwhile, God is patiently waiting for us to call out, “Lord help!” He wants to rescue us. He wants to deliver us. We say, “the Lord is my shepherd,” but we don’t let Him shepherd us. We don’t let Him lead us to the still waters or the green pastures. When we go our own way and fall into distress, He is there looking for us to lead us back to safety. He’s not content to leave us in our situation simply because we’re headstrong and moved away from the pack.

What I’ve never understood about God is how He continues to love me no matter how far or often I move away from the heard. It’s a love I don’t deserve. None of us do. We all do things that get us in the situations listed in this Psalm. There also times where life just happens. There’s nothing we can do about it and don’t feel like we deserve it. Even in those times we have a choice. We can either have a pity party while life continues to rain on us or we can cry out, “Lord help!”

Psalm 145:8 says, “The Lord is close to all who call on Him.” He is waiting for us to call on Him. We often think we’re too far away from Him or done so much that we can never go back. I’ve been there. I was embarrassed and didn’t want to deal with facing those whom I thought I had let down. When I was near my lowest a friend said, “Boy, what are you doing? You need to get your butt back in that church where people know you and love you!” I gave every excuse I could as to why I couldn’t, but none were good enough.

Don’t let pride stand in your way of calling out for the Lord’s help today. Don’t make excuses why you can’t go home. His ear is listening for your voice. His eyes are searching all over for you. Jesus said that He would leave the 99 to find just one. You. You mean the world to Him. Don’t delay. Cry out today, “Lord help!” I promise you that He will come running to you. He will save you and rescue you.

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March 25, 2013 · 8:26 AM

Holy Week

I wasn’t raised to really celebrate Holy Week. In fact, I probably didn’t know it was called “Holy Week” until about a decade ago. We always celebrated Palm Sunday and Easter, but never did anything to celebrate Maundy Thursday or Good Friday. As we celebrated Palm Sunday yesterday, I got to thinking about how this week in Jesus’ life is a lot like many of ours. It’s one more proof that He understands our joys and our pains.

If you are unfamiliar with the story, Jesus rode into Jerusalem on a donkey. As he entered the city, the people began to lay palm leaves on the road and they shouted, “Hosanna to the Son of David! Blessed is He who comes in the name of The Lord. Hosanna in the highest!” It was a parade for a Messiah from a people who thought He was there to deliver them from Roman rule.

He wasn’t there to deliver them from a temporary ruler. He was there to deliver them eternally from sin. They didn’t understand His true purpose. He wasn’t there to be lifted up as a magistrate so all would bow. He was there to be lifted up as a sacrifice for our sins. His purpose was to go there to die and He knew it riding in there that day. I often see pictures and adaptations of Him smiling and waving, but I wonder if that’s accurate. The day before, His face was set like a stone to go to Jerusalem. He was determined to complete His mission.

Somewhere between Sunday and Thursday the crowds turned on Him. The ones who had been yelling “Hosanna” now were yelling “Crucify Him!” Have you ever had life do that to you? One day you were on top of the world. Everything seemed to be going right and then, out of no where, it smacks you down? You’re left with questions, not answers. The ones who were your friends now act like your enemies. Your mind tries to process the information, but it doesn’t add up. “What just happened,” it tries to reason.

Jesus understands those thoughts and doubts. Even though He was determined, He still struggled with the pain and thought of what was going on. His human nature was very much alive. We don’t read about Satan tempting Him here, but you better believe he was working double time on Jesus’ mind during this week. Jesus understands what it’s like to have those closest to you turn their back on you and not even acknowledge that they know you. The difference is He loved them anyway.

Even though they turned on Him, He refused to turn on them. He came here so that we would have forgiveness of our sins. He came to show us that we can still overcome when the world turns its back on us. We can have victory because He was victorious. As you go through this week, don’t just let it be another normal week. Take time this week to read and think through what Jesus went through for you. Be amazed at the pain He endured to show you love and to bring you home. This is Holy Week. This is why He came.

I’m curious to know how others around the world celebrate this week. Let me know how you celebrate it in the comments section below.

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March 11, 2013 · 7:28 AM

Prince of Wholeness

Last week we looked at the names of God. One of the names we covered was Jehovah Shalom. Yesterday at church, we began to dig deeper into the word “Shalom”. Typically it means “peace”. It is often used as a greeting in Israel. One of the other meanings for the word is “completeness” or “whole”. I found that very interesting. So I went back to Isaiah 9:6 where it says Jesus will be called Wonderful, Counsellor, the Mighty God, the Everlasting Father and the Prince of Peace. I switched to the Message version of the Bible and there it called Him the Prince of Wholeness.

My mind raced, “How had I missed that?” I’m not sure how I’ve read that a hundred times and have heard the word shalom over and over and never saw that He is the Prince of Wholeness. We all need peace in our lives so much that we focus on that part of “shalom”, but rarely go deeper into its meaning. We don’t look beyond the surface, but we need to. We need to dig deeper to find so etching like this because we all need it.

I’ve had my life shattered and broken. You probably have too. When I look back at that period in my life, I see myself laying on a foundation in the pouring rain. There is debris of what was my life laying all around. There is nothing that is salvageable. That is there is nothing I can salvage. But here, in this scripture, I see a God who can take the broken pieces of my life and make me whole again. I see a Prince who is not content with leaving me broken and unprotected. He wants me to be whole.

He wants you to be whole too. When you’re broken like this, you think that all is lost. You feel that no one cares. The world is dark around you. You can’t see the future because you can’t imagine a future you’d want to be in. There is no light of hope to guide you. You take each breath as it comes. Each second of the clock ticks in slow motion and survival is your only instinct. You aren’t worried about tomorrow because you’re focused on surviving today. Yes, even in that moment of your life, He is the Prince of Wholeness.

God is able to take you from that place in your life to a place of Wholeness. Completeness. Rebuilt. Stronger. Better. He is the God of creation and He can create a new beginning for you. It’s not something that happens over night. A masterpiece is not painted in a day. A mansion is not built over night. Your life is more complex and worth more to Him than anything else. You may struggle with feelings of unworthiness or worthlessness, but you are worthy and you are priceless. You are worth rebuilding to Him. You are worth being made whole. Don’t give up. Invite the Prince of Wholeness to come in today and to complete the work which He began in you.

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February 27, 2013 · 6:48 AM

Sleep in the Storm

I was reading in the Old Testament this morning. I went to the minor prophets section of it. For some reason, I typically stay away from that area of the Bible. I don’t know if it’s because I’m not as familiar with each of them as the rest of the Bible or if it’s just when I get that close to the New Testament, I get excited and want to jump ahead. Anyway, I read through a couple of them and I came upon a verse in Haggai chapter 1 that stood out to me. It said, “I am with you, says The Lord!” What a powerful reminder from God today.

We all need to hear that verse. God is with you today. No matter what you are facing, what you are going through or what the doctor says, God is with you. There’s a peace in knowing that. My mind goes back to the disciples when they were crossing the sea. Suddenly a storm came over the mountains and caught them by surprise. The boat started taking on water. The thunder was so loud they had to scream to talk to each other. Lightning was flashing brighter than ever. The boat was being rocked and tossed by the waves. Then someone remembered that Jesus was with them.

They went down into the ship only to find Him asleep. How could He sleep through a storm? It was simply that He knew His Father was with Him. The disciples really didn’t understand what it meant at that point to have God with them. They woke Him up in panic and chastised Him. In Mark 4:38, they said, “Don’t you care that we’re going to drown?!?!” Jesus, looked at the storm and said, “Peace. Be still.” Then He asked, “Where is your faith?”

Ouch. They didn’t understand that God was with them. They allowed the storm to cloud their vision. Maybe you’re going through a storm right now. The waves of trouble are tossing you around. The lightning of bad news keeps striking in your life. The thunder of circumstances are so loud that it’s hard to hear God. You’re taking on water and you feel like you’re sinking. I’ve been there. Panic sets in. Stress keeps you from sleeping or eating much. Thoughts of worry creep in and cloud your vision. If that’s you, I want to remind you what Haggai 1:13 says, “I am with you, says The Lord!”

In our Sunday school class, we have a confession we read each week. It says, “The Lord is with me. The Lord is in me. The Lord is for me. The Lord is one with me. I am with The Lord. I am in The Lord. I am for The Lord. I am one with The Lord.” I think that’s a good prayer and reminder for each of us today. We need to not forget that God is with you. He is in you and He is for you. If He is for you, what storm can be victorious over you? You, like Jesus can sleep in the storm.

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February 14, 2013 · 8:20 AM

Loved Beyond Measure

I know that today is one of the hardest days of the year for a lot of people. It’s one more reminder that no one loves them. That they are single…. Still. It’s a difficult day emotionally. Other people are getting roses and gifts at work. They are talking about where they are going to eat tonight. They are showing off expensive gifts this morning. Then people look at those without that today, smile and say, “Don’t worry, you’ll find love someday. You just haven’t met the right one.”

Somehow words like that don’t help. They only drive the dagger deeper into the heart. Everyone has a need for love. Everyone has a need to be accepted by someone. It’s just the way God made us. Because He is love and we were made for Him, we were made with this cavern in us that can only be filled with love. Sure, being loved by a person is great and shows acceptance, but that alone doesn’t fill the cavern. God knew that we would seek out love and hoped that we would find Him.

Instead of finding Him, many find “love” in forms that are not of Him. They get desperate because their mind says, “I was supposed to be married by now” or “Im getting so old that there won’t be anyone left to love me.” I’ve been there. I’ll go a step further. My thoughts said, “All that’s left at this age are the crazies that no one wanted. I’ve got to choose from them. Oh wait, am I one of them?” The mind can play some pretty cruel tricks on you.

I can say that until you learn to love yourself, it will be hard for others to love you. The way you see yourself is the way you project yourself even though you try to mask it. If you don’t love yourself, your mind says, “No one will ever love you.” Then you fight off anyone that even tries. You find fault with them or reasons you shouldn’t be together and sabotage the relationship often unknowingly. It becomes a cycle and the norm.

The first step to loving yourself is realizing that you are already loved. You are loved beyond measure and beyond your own comprehension. I John 4:10 says, “This is real love – not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.” God loves you no matter what. You are His child and He gave His all, His very best, for you! Yes, I’m talking to you. You are valuable. You are worthy of love. You are constantly thought of. Psalm 139: 17-18 says, “How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand.”

Think about that. If every time God thought about you was counted, it would be more than the grains of sand in the Sahara. More than the grains of sand on every beach in the world combined. He’s obsessed with you! He loves you more than anyone including yourself can. Accept that love and know that you are worthy of love, even your own. A person’s love, while good to have, will not fill that cavern in you. It won’t even get you to Heaven, but God’s love will and does.

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