Tag Archives: help

Plan Your Next Chapter

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Can you believe this year is over? I like to think of each year as a chapter in my life closing. It gives me the opportunity to find closure for the things I want to put in my past and keep there. They’re still a part of my over all story and the development of my character, but I can choose to leave them behind. I remind myself that there’s not a great protagonist without an antagonist, and no one achieves greatness without being marred by failures and disappointments. It’s how we choose to see those things in our life, how we respond to them and whether or not we have the ability to move past them that makes us great.

How do you choose to see the roadblocks that came into your life this year? What are you going to do about the failures and disappointments that happened? How are you responding to life changes that came out of nowhere? Bitter. Angry. Hurt. Faithless. Defeated. Those are words I would have used for the times when I’ve faced years that didn’t go according to my plan. It’s not wrong that you feel those things. They’re normal human emotions that God placed in us. If we hold onto those emotions and allow them to steer our decisions and life, then we get into trouble.

God told us in Ephesians 4:26, “Be angry and sin not.” He was saying that’s ok to feel these emotions, but don’t let them control you. I know that’s easier said than done, but it’s a choice. One that only you can make. You can choose to leave those feelings behind in this chapter along with the reasons for those feelings. You can choose to pick out the good things in your life and to move forward with them instead. Begin your next chapter on a high note. Begin the next year free from the things that held you down this year.

Next year is full of blank pages waiting to be filled. You have to choose if you want this chapter to be a comedy, tragedy, drama or adventure. Just because this year was full of drama or tragedy it doesn’t mean that next year has to be. I’m reminded of those “Choose Your Own Adventure” books I read when I was a child. At the bottom of each page, you had the choice of what the character did next. If you thought they should do this, then you turned to page 38. If you thought they should do that, then you turned to page 64. Life is a lot like that. You choose your next steps.

I choose to let God order my next steps. I still have to take them, but I don’t have to take them alone. Before you do anything or begin to write your chapter for next year, stop and ask God what He wants to fill your pages with. Ask Him to help you close this chapter and to move on from it. Seek His wisdom in where you go from here. Spend time in prayer and planning instead of just letting life take you where it wants. Just like a budget tells your money where to go, a plan tells your life where to go. Get together with God and make a plan for an amazing new year.

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Free From Shame

It’s Free Friday! What are you going to be free from today? The choice is yours to let it go. To celebrate Free Friday, I’m giving away a free copy of “The Shack: Reflections for Every Day of the Year” by William Paul Young. Keep reading to find out how.

Shame is defined by dictionary.com as “the painful feeling arising from the consciousness of something dishonorable, improper, ridiculous, etc., done by oneself or another.” There’s not a single person who ever lived, besides Jesus, who didn’t do one of those things. The problem with shame is that it can imprison us and keep us from moving forward even after we’ve been forgiven. It can dominate our thoughts and make us feel worthless. The sad part is that we don’t just have to do the action ourselves. Sometimes what someone else does to us can make us feel shame too.

If we’re not careful we can end up in a prison of shame through no fault of our own. An action that was done to us by someone we trusted can create those feelings of worthlessness, pain and embarrassment. If we’re not careful, those feelings of shame can turn into bitterness. Bitterness can then turn into hatred. Hatred can keep us from forgiving. If we can’t forgive even the worst offenses done to us, we ourselves can’t be forgiven by God. We have to learn to forgive the ones who have brought shame on us. When we forgive them, we release ourselves from the mental bondage we were held in.

I’m not saying the pain will go away. I still feel the pain years later, but I’m not held in a prison of hatred and shame anymore. Instead of being in bondage, I use that pain to speak to others who have been shamed by someone else. It is possible to forgive the unforgivable. It is possible to move forward after you’ve been seriously wronged. I know it’s a tough mental battle to get rid of the feelings of shame and to be able to find forgiveness for them and yourself. It’s not something that happens overnight. It’s a process that takes time, but it starts with one choice, forgiveness, and only you can make that choice.

It took me years to get to that point. I held on to the pain and those thoughts weighed me down. They kept me from reaching my potential. They kept me from an intimate relationship with God. They affected every other relationship I had. Those thoughts are so harmful and are designed to isolate you from the people who do love you and truly care for you. You must make the choice to release yourself from something you’ve done or someone else for what they’ve done if you truly want to get rid of shame. You must find a way to forgive them if you want God to forgive you. Today, make the choice to start down the road of being free from shame.

If you’d like to win “The Shack: Reflections for Every Day of the Year” by William Paul Young which is collection of highlights from the book “The Shack”, you have three ways to enter today. The first way you can get your name in the drawing is by signing up to receive Devotions by Chris in your email. The second way is to go to www.facebook.com/devotionsbychris and like my page. The third way you can enter is by going to that Facebook page and liking one of today’s statuses. Anyone who does any of those three things today, December 7, 2013, will be entered. I’ll draw tomorrow morning and announce the winner on my Facebook page. If you win, send me a private message with the address you’d like the book shipped to.

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Free From Worry

It’s Free Friday! What are you going to be free from today? The choice is yours to let it go. To celebrate Free Friday, I’m giving away a free copy of Lindsey Clifford’s book “Just Jesus: His Living Words”. Keep reading to find out how to enter.

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For a lot of people, Christmas is their favorite time of year. They love the spirit of it, the joy, the parties, the experience and fun. For others, it is the most depressing time of year. With all that Christmas brings, it also brings added stress and worry to their lives. Instead of being able to enjoy the season, they struggle with managing their schedule, paying bills and being able to buy presents for everyone on their list. They allow worry to come in and take over their mind. If that describes you, then today is your day to be free.

Worrying is not part of God’s plan for you. He doesn’t want you to stress out over things you can’t control. He didn’t design your mind or body to function with all that self induced heaviness. The Bible has a lot to say about worrying. In Matthew 6:34, Jesus said, “Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.” He was very clear that we need to let go of the “what ifs” that keep us up at night and to trust God.

I’ve learned in my own life that worry is toxic to your well being. Nothing good comes from worrying. All it does is cloud your mind and sap your energy. It will consume you, your thoughts and your sleep. God doesn’t want you to live like that. He wants you to release those worries to Him. I Peter 5:7 says, “Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares for you.” Worrying has never changed the outcome of a situation, but God has. If your reply to this message or others is, “Well someone has to worry about it,” you’re right. Someone does. God. Let Him worry about it.

So what should you do instead? In Philippians 4:6, Paul tells us, “Don’t worry or fret. Instead of worrying, pray.” Prayer is how you free yourself from worry. You hand the reigns of what’s bothering you over to God. You take yourself out of the driver’s seat and let God take over. If you are consumed with thoughts and worry, you haven’t let God take control of the situation. What’s worse is you haven’t trusted Him with it. You think you can handle it better than He can. It’s time to right the order of things and hand your cares and worries off to Him. It’s time to be free of the worries that have bound you up and kept you from enjoying life. Today is your day to be free.

If you’d like to win Lindsey Clifford’s book “Just Jesus” which is collection and organization of all of Jesus’ words here on earth, you have three ways to enter today. The first way you can get your name in the drawing is by signing up to receive Devotions by Chris in your email. The second way is to go to www.facebook.com/devotionsbychris and like my page. The third way you can enter is by going to that Facebook page and liking one of today’s statuses. Anyone who does any of those three things today, December 6, 2013, will be entered. I’ll draw tomorrow morning and announce the winner on my Facebook page. If you win, send me a private message with the address you’d like the book shipped to.

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I Love Mondays

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Did you ever read the “Garfield” comic strips? He was famous for saying, “I hate Mondays.” That resonated with so many people. Cubicals everywhere had a picture of him with a coffee mug and that expression on it. Now the saying is all over people’s Facebook page on Mondays. It doesn’t resonate with me though. It’s not that I don’t enjoy my weekends, but Mondays to me are a fresh start. The old week is gone, the new week is here and I get new challenges. The meetings will begin shortly after I log in, the todo list will be built and the week will be set up. Now that I think about it, I kind of like Mondays.

Ok, so maybe you don’t enjoy them like I do. To me, it’s all about perspective. The attitude with which you start your day will determine how you act throughout it. Fridays seem to be more enjoyable because your starting attitude is different. There are only 8 hours standing between you and the weekend and so you have this expectancy, this hope that gets you through with a smile on your face. I believe every day should be that way. I believe the attitude I choose each morning is what determines the outcome of my day.

In the month of November, several of my friends post something they’re thankful for each and every day. They often say that November is their favorite month. Coincidence? A heart full of gratitude is one that has a positive outlook. Each morning I try to find something to be thankful for. Some days, I’m just thankful I’m breathing. Other days, there are so many blessings that it’s hard to choose from. No matter what, I’m always thankful that God’s mercy is new every morning. I’m thankful that each day is a blank slate with God. I wake up forgiven for the mistakes I made yesterday because I’ve asked for it and I don’t have to worry that God is going to hold hem against me.

If God doesn’t hold it against me after I’ve asked for forgiveness, then I need to release myself from the guilt as well. Most of the time that my attitude is wrong is because I hold myself in some kind of penance purgatory. It’s as if God’s forgiveness wasn’t enough. It’s as if it was too easy to find new mercy this morning so I have to make sure I have a bad day to make up for my sin. You can’t earn God’s grace that way! He’s already paid the price for what you did yesterday. Once it’s forgiven and He’s forgotten it, you need to release yourself to be free in His mercy.

Don’t hate today because it’s Monday. Love it because He has granted you forgiveness from your past and has new mercy for you today. Don’t hold yourself back from the potential that today holds because of something you’ve been forgiven of. Release yourself to find joy in the new day and be open to see how God can use the mistakes of your yesterdays for His glory. You have the power to wake up today (and tomorrow) and say, “Thank you, God, that your mercies are new every morning. I don’t hate today because of what it stands for. I love it because of what you’ve done for me.” Try it and see if an attitude adjustment doesn’t make Mondays or any other day better.

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Fixing Your Life

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As I was pulling out of the parking lot at work yesterday, I felt God tell me to go the opposite direction that I should have. So I turned left instead of right. About a block away I saw a young lady trying to change her tire. I pulled up beside her and asked if she needed help. She was clearly frustrated and said, “At this point, I don’t think I can turn down help.” She had been trying to place the jack under the car in order to raise it up. She had it in position, but was having trouble turning the knob that lifted the jack.

I looked over at the styrofoam block that contained her jack and noticed there was an empty hole where the jack bar was supposed to be. I asked her where that was, but she didn’t know. I tried once or twice turning the knob by hand, but didn’t have the required strength to do it. I went to my car, got the jack out of it, slid it under her car and quickly raised it. In no time her spare was on and we were both able to head out. Having the right tool made all the difference.

I started thinking that’s how life is. When we get stranded on the side of life’s road broken down, we get frustrated trying to fix it without the right tools. We don’t try to flag anyone down to help us until we’re at the end of our rope. This lady had tried to call family members, but no one answered when she called. She didn’t know what else to do, but to keep trying even though it didn’t make sense. In the end, she was tired, worn out, upset and ready to give up.

I’ve been there in life. I lacked the strength and tools to make the changes necessary to get my life back on the road and moving again. I laid down in my living room and cried out to God, “I can’t do it! I don’t know how!” He met me there and said, “Finally.” I thought it was a strange response. He said, “Finally you’ve given up trying to do this in your own strength. Now try doing it in my strength. My strength is made perfect in your weakness.” I had to come to the realization that we weren’t made to handle all the troubles and cares of this life on our own. He told us over and over in His Word to cast our cares and burdens on Him, but we don’t get it.

He has the tools necessary to fix your life when you don’t. He has the strength needed to pick you up when you don’t. He has always given us the choice to continue struggling on our own or to rely on His strength. It’s just a matter of when each one of us makes the realization for ourselves that we need Him to help us. It took a while for me to learn how to walk in His strength. I’m still learning, but I’m getting better at calling out to Him sooner for help. What will it take to get you to the point where you can’t turn down His help?

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Out Of The Hole

It’s hard for me to believe that next week I will be celebrating the 10th anniversary of the lowest point of my life. I know it seems odd to celebrate such an event, but for me, it was a turning point in my life. It was the moment when I refused to go any lower than I was and made the decision that I would claw my way out of the hole that I was in no matter how much effort it took and no matter how long it took. I’m still clawing my way out of that hole, but now I’m starting to see daylight.

Ten years ago, there was no light at the end of the tunnel. There was no hope of ever recovering from what I had been through. I was hurt, embarrassed and alone. Sure I had a few friends around me, but no one truly knew the depth of my pain or what I was struggling with. I made a conscious effort to never think about that time in my life. I felt that if I could pretend it was a bad dream, the pain would go away. I thought that if I never spoke of it again, then I could put it behind me.

I moved on with my life pretending that I hadn’t gone through a painful divorce, filed for bankruptcy, lost my business or ran away from those who cared most about me. I figured that the best way out was to start my life over fresh and new as if none of it never happened. The problem was it did happen. Underneath everything I was still a mess inside. I was still hurt to the core. I was mad at God for letting me walk through that. I was mad at others thinking my failures were somehow their fault. It all boiled down to bad decision making by me.

Once I was able to take responsibility for the things that happened, I began to move forward. It’s not easy to look in the mirror when you know the pain inside is caused by the person looking back at you. I know other people played roles in delivering the punches that knocked me down, but I made the decisions that put them there and put myself in that position. I left myself open for the gut shots that took the wind out of my desire to live or move on.

I hid the pain for over seven years as I moved on with life. It was then that God spoke to me through Dave Roever that I needed to expose the wounds and face them head on. Since that time, I have begun to share my story being open and honest about what happened. I have found healing for the wounds that were so deep. I still feel the pain like I did every time I open them up, but I know that through my wounds others can find help, hope and healing for theirs.

I don’t know what you’re facing today, but I know what it’s like to hit rock bottom and feel like there’s no way out. I know what it’s like to think that there’s only one way out of the pain and anger. I can tell you that there is another way out. I found it. It was through forgiving myself and others who hurt me. It was in finding forgiveness through Jesus for the unthinkable wrongs I’d committed. It was over the course of years, hard work, dedication and never giving up. If I can make it out of that hole, you can too.

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Dealing with Distractions

I always seem to get distracted during my prayer time on Monday’s. My mind tries to think through the week ahead starting with the meetings today. I catch myself going down rabbit trails in my mind when I should be praying. It’s hard to concentrate on what I’m reading in the Bible when I’ve got other things popping up in my mind. When I try to be quiet before The Lord, songs, music, thoughts on how to resolve situations and schedules start to cloud my mind. Not to mention, it would be nice to sleep a little longer since it is Monday and the weekend is officially over.

Do you ever go through this? Do you find it hard to keep your mind focused on God when you’re supposed to be spending time with Him? I think most of us do. Our minds are problem solvers and are constantly thinking through how to fix things in our lives. It happens in our prayer times because that’s the only time we’re still enough to let our minds work. We force ourselves to stop and concentrate on God, but our mind has other plans.

If we look in the Gospels, we see that Jesus made it a habit to get away from everything, go off to secluded places and spent time with God. Many of us would love a secluded place just to get away from the kids, noise, obligations, phone calls, text messages and emails! But to spend time with God, we need to find that place to spend with Him, not just to escape our daily life. As a kid, I remember that any morning I got up early, if I went to the living room, I’d find my mom there with her Bible and a cup of coffee. That was her time.

Each of us have different schedules, different obligations and different situations. There’s no one size fits all approach to spending time with God without distractions. I wish there was. Instead, it takes a conscious effort on our part to find that time and place where we can spend uninterrupted time alone with God. It’s up to us to turn off the phone, get away from noisy distractions, find a secluded place and to get alone with God. I struggled for years with this. I didn’t prioritize my time with Him so I allowed the distractions to take over that time.

Now, I’ve made a decision that I won’t let anything interrupt that time. The only time I found on my schedule to do that was my commute to work. When a thought other than one that is God-centered pops in, I check it, push it out and quiet my mind again. I turn the radio off, keep my eyes on the road and treat it as I would if I were having a meeting. Doing these simple things have helped my spiritual life to grow more in the past two years than the previous decades combined. It all started with the decision to make it a priority above everything else.

I’m curious to see how others have found time in their busy schedules to spend time alone with God. What do you do? What best practices do you have that help you stay on track with your quality time with God? How do you keep other thoughts from distracting you? How do you make time when there seems to be none? Please share so that all of us can benefit and find ways to improve our own quiet time with God. If we learn to spend quality time with God, our lives will have more quality.

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Changing Routes

When I lived in the Middle East, the U.S. Embassy would often tell us to change our routines and the way we went to work. We were told to find a different path, go in at different times and to be unpredictable in our routes. It was easy to take my route to the church each day. I would ride my bike over the flyover, go up a few blocks, turn left for one block and then go right. I waved each morning to the men at the bakery. I said, “Good morning” in Arabic to the furniture makers. I nodded at the guards at the intersections. I was comfortable in that route.

I think we love routine because we feel there’s safety in it. We can do it without thinking and it’s easy. We see the same things each day and they become ordinary to us. Changing routes and routines throws everything off. There are new sites, new people, and new patterns that cause us to have to be alert and to pay attention. We as Christians should be doing this in our lives often. Not only will it give us a heightened awareness of what’s around us, it can increase our circle of influence.

I pray each day for God to open my eyes to see what He wants me to see, but I keep the same routine and wonder why I’m not seeing anything. Changing routines and routes in our lives changes our perspective. It forces us out of the mundane and into the extraordinary. It allows God to reveal things to us that we couldn’t see from our old perspective. It helps us to see other people who need our help that weren’t in our path before. It keeps our lives fresh.

I’ve heard it said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. How can we expect God to move in our lives, open our eyes and change our perspective if we just keep doing the same old things over and over? We have to get out of what is familiar to us. We have to quit asking Him to put people in our path and start asking Him to put us in their path! If we want to grow, we have to be willing to change.

I’m not a person who likes change, but the company I work for believes in it and I’ve learned to adapt. Being comfortable doesn’t help you to be the best. It helps you fall into a false sense of security. It makes you think that what you’re doing is enough. The rich, young ruler who went to Christ was comfortable. He had kept all the commandments since he was a kid. He did what was right. Jesus asked Him to make a radical change to his routine and route. He couldn’t do it and walked away sad. He wanted different results while doing the same thing.

What routines and routes do you need to change? What is God asking you to do differently than you’ve always done? Are you asking Him to put people in your path or to put you in their path? Changing isn’t easy and doesn’t produce immediate results always. It isn’t comfortable so we typically run from it. Don’t be afraid to ask God what paths, routines and routes in your life you need to change. Once you ask, have the faith to make those changes so you don’t end up like the rich, young ruler.

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Get Up, Don’t Give Up

For the first time in a long time, I watched the movie “Rudy”. If you’ve never seen it, it’s the story of a young kid who wants to play football for Notre Dame. His family laughs when he tells them he’s going to. His high school won’t let him go visit the campus because his grades weren’t good enough. Notre Dame refused to let him in also. None of that stopped him. He finally got accepted and made the practice squad for the football team. Every time he got hit, he got back up for the next play.

The story is really about what someone who has a lot of heart can endure and accomplish. Rudy wasn’t athletic, but he was strong willed. He wasn’t smart, but he was a hard worker. He wasn’t easily dismayed because he had determination. His coaches all wished they could take his heart and put it in someone with athletic ability. He kept pushing for his dream no matter what others said.

Where most people would have given up, he kept getting up. That’s a lesson for each of us today. It’s easy to give up when life keeps hitting us. It’s natural to want to stay down when others think you should just give up. But God put something in each one of us that makes us want to get back up. I know that after a while, that thing that God put in us can get awful quiet compared the thoughts of quitting and giving up. It can seem non-existent when you’re on your back and you have stars going around your head because you’ve just been hit so hard.

Let’s be honest. It’s easy to stay down. The fear of getting hit again tries to talk you into staying down. The embarrassment of the situation and what others think starts to convince you to just give up. It makes me think of a demotivational poster I once saw that said, “At some point, hanging in there just makes you look like an even bigger loser.” Those are the thoughts that the enemy brings to keep you down and to convince you not to get back up. He does that because he knows that each time you get back up, you’re stronger for it.

At some point, he has to quit throwing stuff at you. He knows this is only temporary, but if he can convince you it’s permanent, you’ll stay down and quit. When that happens, he wins. For me, I can’t stand to lose, especially to the enemy. I learned what it took to motivate myself to get back up each day, take a hit and to keep moving forward. It all starts with the mind. You must learn to block the thoughts that tell you to give up. You must learn to motivate yourself with God’s Word. Understand that while you have it bad, someone else has it worse. If they could still stand, I knew I could.

You may have to take several more hits before this is over. Stand strong though. Know that this period of trials and struggles is only temporary. I know that when it keeps coming month after month it doesn’t feel that way. Get back up today, stand your ground and declare that you won’t lose any more ground. Seek God’s strength to help you when yours fails. Know that you are becoming stronger than you ever would have if these things wouldn’t have happened and God will always be able to use that in your future.

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Friends Who Won’t Quit

This morning I was praying for a friend’s daughter who recently had a stroke. I saw my friend’s Facebook post wishing she could hear her daughter speak to her again. I could hear the desperation in her voice through the printed words on my screen. I began to call out in desperation with her for God to hear her prayer and to answer it. As I prayed, my mind went back to a scripture that God took me to this morning in Ephesians 3. The Message puts verse 20 like this, “God can do anything, you know – far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams!”

As I continued to pray, I asked, “God, I know you can do anything. How do I get you to go from can do to action?” I know God has the ability. I need Him to not just have the ability, but to actually do. I then though that I have the ability to do so much, what motivates me to move into action? It’s usually when someone or something demands my attention the most that causes me to put it at the front of my action items. It’s when something becomes the most pressing thing that I usually act.

My mind then went to the story in Luke 5 and Mark 2 of a paraplegic man who needed healing. He didn’t have the ability to get into God’s presence on his own. He had the desire, but lacked the strength. It was four of his friends who carried him to Jesus. When they got there, the house that Jesus was in was so crowded that no one could get in or out. I don’t know how long those friends tried to get in or if they tried to reason with others that their friend had a more desperate need to see Jesus than they did. What I do know is that they weren’t going to sit idly by and let there friend remain that way. They weren’t going to wait for Jesus to come out of the house.

Instead, they carried him to the roof, pulled the roof off tile by tile until they were above where Jesus was. They then lowered their friend into the presence of Jesus who had the ability to do far more than they could imagine in their wildest dreams. They caused Jesus to act. They caused Him to turn His attention to that friend and to say, “Get up. Take your bedroll and go home.” He was moved from can do anything to doing something because the friends wouldn’t quit.

We all need friends who are willing to carry us into the presence of an all mighty God who can do anything. We need friends who won’t stop or stay at the back of the line when we are in desperate need for a touch from God. We need friends who when the door to the Throne Room is blocked and the area around Jesus is crowded that will not give up and go to the roof of Heaven, tear back the tiles and put us at the feet of Jesus. Jesus said where two or three are gathered, I’m with them. This man had four friends gathered to put him in the presence of Jesus.

You may be on that mat today without the ability to get in front of Jesus. You may need some friends to join with you in your desperation to put you in the front of the line where you have Jesus’ full attention. If that’s you, comment below. Tell those who read this what you need prayer for. We can be those friends who carry you to Jesus when there seems to be no way into His presence. We’ll tear off the roof and lower you down to where He is. We won’t stop until Jesus goes from can do to action. If you’re reading this and have the ability, I’m asking you to join me in prayer today for those who don’t have the ability and are in desperate need for a touch from God.

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